This is a selection of IMs from my friend Kenny.

Enjoy at your own risk.

Cray Cray

Posted: February 18, 2014 3:28 PM by Dvan

Kenny: wo0, just survived a meeting with my boss
Kenny: so i can relax for another week
Dvan: hehe
Kenny: im getting closer to a job
Kenny: they want to give me a `personality test`
Dvan: heh
Kenny: it's a non-senior position though
Kenny: it even says "reports to senior sys admin"
Kenny: wat i ain't takin no orders from another sys admin
Kenny: :|
Dvan: And thats why they want a personality test.
Kenny: o dam
Kenny: im' not an idiot, i can work the system
Dvan: Don't be cray cray
Kenny: i can hide the crazy
Kenny: i dream about shooting my boss but im going to score all, "plays well with others" "caring and considerate" on this s**t
Dvan: and cray cray
0 0


Posted: February 14, 2014 10:39 AM by Dvan

Kenny: last night i was on the phone w/ my dad and to make a long story short, i offered to give him my password to this particular site...
Kenny: then i remembered that my password was "chickenf**ker"
Kenny: good thing he said no thanks
Dvan: ahh hahaha
0 2

Insensitive Kenny

Posted: February 04, 2014 4:09 PM by Dvan

Kenny: is this ur mom
Kenny: hehe
Kenny: that's someone's oblivious mom
Dvan: my mom's dead remember?
Kenny: s**t
0 0


Posted: January 27, 2014 2:43 PM by Dvan

Kenny: third day in a row of stock crash :(
Kenny: my poor money :(
Kenny: got a reply from an architecture firm, they want to interview me to be a server slave :(
Kenny: i'll probably do it if they confirm no easten europeans
Dvan: racist
Kenny: technically Yes
Dvan: wait. Poor Money? That's called "Karma" for not workin'!
Kenny: yeah I been looking at houses in Sellwood all morning
Dvan: So... What exactly are you supposed to do there?
Kenny: where I work now ?
Dvan: yea
Kenny: not sure
Dvan: no wonder you trade stocks
0 1

The Hipstors

Posted: January 24, 2014 11:13 AM by Dvan

Kenny: if i hadn't moved back to bend once already, i might be doing it now
Kenny: but i ain't gonna do that twice
Kenny: actually portland is starting to get old
Dvan: wow what?!?
Dvan: hipster.
Kenny: haha!! no i want to get away from the hipstors
Dvan: you can't outrun yourself.
0 2


Posted: January 13, 2014 2:17 PM by Dvan

Kenny: i thought my boss installed a sensor above my desk to record me
Kenny: so on friday when everyone left i smashed it
Kenny: anyway then the cover popped off and i googled the numbers and it's a daylight sensor for offiec lighting
Kenny: whoops
Dvan: LOL
Dvan: Little paranoid?
Kenny: Yep
Dvan: Well, you should be - working for the Russians
0 0


Posted: January 07, 2014 11:08 AM by Dvan

Kenny: pretty sure we got someone campin in the bike room
Kenny: i seen him in there before with his laptop, today i entered, assumed i was alone , did my bike stuff and pushed the auto-door-opener button to exit
Kenny: but then decided i wanted to blow my nose so walked toward the shower area and he just pops out of nowhere
Kenny: looking all freaked and ran into the bathroom
Kenny: anyway i think he heard me open the door and that's when he diecided to come out - only i did not exit at that time
Kenny: creapy
0 1

Scary Kenny

Posted: December 13, 2013 12:49 PM by Dvan

Kenny: how do you walk up to someone's desk and not scare them? i always do it to people
Dvan: walk really hard on the floor?
Kenny: ok
Kenny: i would softly throat whistle as i am approaching but i am trying to stop it
Dvan: hah
Kenny: but it's very useful for that
Kenny: i do it in when walking in crowded places w/ my gf
Kenny: or in crowded group bike rides
Dvan: And what does your gf think of that?
Dvan: (throat whistle)
Kenny: she says at first she thought it was strange but now she accepts it
Dvan: heh
Kenny: says the same thing about that i talk to my cat
0 1

"Tina from OPB"

Posted: December 09, 2013 2:35 PM by Dvan

Kenny: hmm i just got a call from 503 number and was hoping it was about a job
Kenny: but it was "Tina from OPB"
Kenny: so i said, annoyed, "hi."
Kenny: she said "Oh, is this a bad time, did I wake you?"
Dvan: lol you ass
Kenny: I said, "No, but I have already donated to OPB this year and I assume you're about to ask for more money which I am not prepared to give this year"
Dvan: ha
Kenny: she said "No, in fact I just was calling to say thank you for your support"
Kenny: BS
0 1

Priorities are in line...

Posted: December 05, 2013 1:58 PM by Dvan

Kenny: the african president has died
Dvan: I don't think he was the president at the time of death, but yeah, heard he died.
Kenny: ican't work b/c im distraught
Kenny: guess i will spend the rest of the afternoon balancing my budgets
Kenny: apparently the dead african president went to jail, now y would we celebrate a crooked president ?
Dvan: wtf really?
0 1